Thank You and STFU morons

On behalf of my-sane-self, i would like to thank every comments received for the past few days, it did help me to cope with my current situation. This month is going to be hard for me and the rest of my close family, but we've been through hell before, hope we can make it through this time too.

As what Ornest wrote in his comment in my previous post "The most important thing is to forgive and let go...". I have forgiven her, in fact i never blame her. During this hard time, she has made me realize that the love between family should be unconditional, regardless of your wrongdoings. Like they say "Susah senang, family will always be there". One positive gain so far.

Negative one..hmm..I've seen the bad side of some of my moron-distant-family members since long time ago,and as predicted, THEY DID IT AGAIN! ; they wasted ZERO money on us, yet they act like they are the one who raises us. They get over react, and start cursing as if they're God. These morons go to church every sunday, mind you! Funny thing is, they always talk behind us, never do it in front. Pussy! Just so you know, these people juga lah yang abused me mentally when i was 10-12! Well, that'll be another unreveal story lah. You wouldnt want to know what they've said to me, trust me.

My DAD, bapa kandung, biological dad, the one who raises us with his OWN money, NEVER act like they did, as what i've seen so far lah. Dad's logic mind is greater than his emotions, a great man indeed. As long as dad keep himself compose, and keep loving us that's more than enough. The babi babi sekalian, who is suppose to be FAMILY (ptuiiihhh!!!) can booked their tickets straight to hell by keep saying bad things behind us, curse her, curse me yang they claimed as kurang ajar, and God knows the upcoming ones .I f-ing seriously DONT CARE. Another positive gain,during this time i realize the people who stand by my side. Words cant describe how grateful i am to have you people in my life. I always know i'm blessed in so many ways, and the presence of you people, are just too awesome for me. Thank you very much.

I know now i can move on, and be happy. *And those who know me in real life, stop asking me why why why why for shit sake. I dont feel like sharing my personal things to you lah, respect that! *

lalalalalala

This condition might be the consequences of various feelings which come in bundle (in 3 days,mind you)..If few days ago i was so merry like santa, and yesterday was so down, today i am amuse..of myself! haha. Macam ayat orang gila pula bah ada konflik perasaan. Atau adakah saya mencipta konflik perasaan sendiri nih? lols. Some say,time will heal everything, which i dont agree a pinch. Let say in a chemical reaction, we need two reactants to produce one product (assume this is an ideal reaction, no side product). In order to shift the reaction to favoring the product, we need catalyst to increase the reaction rate. However catalyst wont be consume during the reaction,if it comes in 1 mol, then out will be 1 mol too. This is how catalyst and time (as per context) is connected; We can put in as many catalyst as we want to increase/decrease the rate but at the end of the reaction, the quality of the product depends strongly on reactant, which is in this case is the human lah. Funny when us, humans keep on relying on time to mend things, but it happens to some people, and no offence if you're happen to be one of them. This a note to myself to stay compose supaya tidak jadi gila semula. Anyway,i've been listening to this track by Jay Chou for few days. A sombre one,but i dont feel the sadness while singing,which is so unlike me. Adakah saya suda sot? Hm..My tongue get twisted singing the song, that's when i know my mandarin gagal dengan cemerlang suda.

ru guo yao zuo qing ni ji de wo ru guo nan guo

qing ni wang liao wo

I think i need another weekend gateway, dad too.

While i was away..

This morning, i had a long conversation with dad in the car. Something had happened for the past few months and i only been told about the details today,while dad been told yesterday! It's too personal to share, but i know this shit happens in some family, so it's not a big fuss for you to know anyway.

-To You-

I know you dont even know the existence of this blog penned by your sister, but if you've miraculously found it, i just want you to know that me and dad are devastated by the decision that you've selfishly made. Don't come to us in 10 years time and says you regret doing it, you should've known the aftermath better. Despite of all these, we still love you as always. Me and dad will help you to get through the shits from 'them' which is about to come in near time, at the same time, i hope you'll open your eyes to see how this family that you've put behind works as your support system, something that you'll never get elsewhere. -end- **Anyway, i've been swamped by lots of lurrvve for the past few days, this news however balance my current emotions; I'm neither sad nor happy. So no worries.**

Quickie..

-The author refuse to come back to reality-

Here comes

She'll spend her holiday to a place quite similar to this to celebrate life. Dad says "it's a waste of money", the indirect meaning of that,by all means is "i just want you to stay at home, be the sweet,little girl that you used to be so that i can monitor you all the time". Most dads are like that, yes? Or maybe dad is in denial state, reluctant to accept the fact that us have grown up. Hmm..

I refuse to feed his need merely because this is my life, i deserve all the good and bad in life. Thus, i'm off to that place tonight and will be back on Monday. *Geez, this morning dad was so quiet in the car, merajuk mungkin..hm..* Happy holiday people!

The Pink Sisterhood: breast cancer awareness month

Tagging rules:

1. Put the logo in your blog
2. Add a link to the person who shared it with you.
3. Nominate at least 7 other blogs and leave a note for your nominee on their blog (ok, read saaaaaana bawah)
4. Add links to these blogs on your blog:1. -Fara, 2. massy 3. N.O.Y 4. Bandagedknee's: Sink Into My Darkness [The Coffin Talk] 5. mell_f 6. -YOUR BLOG HERE-

*Someone in my family died because of breast cancer, thus knowing the probability of me getting it is very high, i do all my best to lessen it. I know it can strike me anytime, for it's already in my gene. Nah,bikin takut kan. Regardless of any month that we're talking right now, I hope the women/men out there will take good care of their body, as much as i care mine.*

Thus, i'm tagging these 7 ppl: Chris Izan Esther bebeh Urang Ranau Toiletpaper aka Max (i've read ur recent post about health bah,tu la i pilih u..euwww) Nadia Sweetie

Today's thought

Date: 23 Oct 2008 Time: the moment i woke up till now. haha! Venue: bedroom-bathroom-office. haha lagi! Mood: Sot and happy juga.

"Fate determines who comes into our lives, heart determines who stays."

Of Tuesday

Have read technical report for 3 hours, and i'm not even reaching half of the whole pages. Then the other two are waiting to be read. sheesh. I foresee myself to be juling, sleepy and kerazie if i dont get some entertainment fix that moment. Thus, at times when tense arise at work, all you have to do is: Go to youtube, search for David Archuletta's latest single, Crush..then imagine he's singing that for you. That works very well on me. haha! .* To guys,chill ok?. Dont hate David because ur gf adores him. haha!* Or You can listen to Coldplay's recent masterpiece named "Viva la Vida" (which in Spanish means long live life but Coldplay alias-ed the song as Death and All his friends..hm). I dont know about you ppl but imho, Chris Martin's voice has this distinct tune and it soothes to listen to. The lyrics are wise-made too. Or Chat with a whacky friend. Haha! Thanks to you, it was sangat menggembirakan ok? Or Update yer' blog. Or Do all the mentioned above. Multitask ppl fascinates me. Happy Wednesday! (haha..only kadusmama understand the reason of bringing forward Wednesday before it suppose to be ) Oh,my working hours is from 7.30am-4.30pm. That explains my advance-going-home time. Oh again, to any chemical eng. graduates who have interest of working in SFI, they're presently hiring chemical eng management trainee. Go to their website for more info. a friend of mine ask me to forward the sms around..SMS lagi? please. I can spread it free here. Ok,no more oh.

Always the smarter choice

click to enlarge

That's my Digi's bill statement for this month.

We always assume that sms-es cost cheaper than making calls, however since the conversion of my prepaid plan to postpaid, thing goes reversely. Tapi i dont think 603 sms-es in a month is too much la, ada lagi yg sampai beribu ribu sms-es what. keh keh keh.

I should have call and call and call and talk like there's no tomorrow. Nonetheless, i still heart Digi :) . Zero charge between me and BF,you kneeoww..I'm glad Digi has such plan. kalau tidak, pokai oh. Now tell me, which is always the smarter choice? say what? haha!

Virgins..do read this.

A virgin girl is on the phone and asks her boyfriend to come over and have dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl announces to her boyfriend that after dinner, she would like to go out and make love for the first time. * * * * * * * * * Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get some condoms. He tells the pharmacist it's his first time and the pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and sex. * * * * * * * * * At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family pack. The boy insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all. * * * * * * * * * That night, the boy shows up at the girl's parents house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm so excited for you to meet my parents, come on in!" * * * * * * * * * The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say grace and bows his head. * * * * * * * * * A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down. * * * * * * * * * 10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy. * * * * * * * * * Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to the boyfriend, "I had no idea you were this religious." * * * * * * * * The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a pharmacist." P.S Should've said the condoms are meant for a science project. lol. Happy weekend peeps.

Of today.

I have no drive to do work at the moment, blame it all on the hard-knocking-GDEx fella. Sangat kurang asam ok. He knocked the door so hard as if he's a hulk wannabe, while i, the very ayu and gentle lass is tracking down client's invoice, diiringi dengan lagu laguan yang sentimental. I am so disturbed by the loudness, cant even do the tracking properly, then i stop everything. I call the guard to check on the fella. Padan muka. Knock yang berhemah will do la bah, dont knock as if no tomorrow. Sheessshh. Anyway, tomorrow is friday..yeay!. Everybody loves friday. Wont be around during weekends, have to accompany my friend in the hotel till sunday. So it'll be a weekend for the girls only, yes?

Cat post

Got this from PhotoFunia

kitty: She'z looking after uz. We should runz. Big cat: We should notz. We're safe 'ere. kitty: -_-"

He loves me....NOT

I thought your heart belongs to no one but me. I know I am mischievous. I am stubborn. I am difficult. I always put you at the edge. Somehow you still love me. I naively thought the feelings stay forever. With our current mode of relationship, many possible bad things can happen. You assured me it’ll be fine. I trust you. Until i found out that you’ve been checking on other babes. Last week you told me you want that babe, I ask you the reason; you came out with lots of it. “He must have been thought about this deliberately”, I mumbled. My heart ache, I know I can’t deviate you from materialize that decision. And selfishly you did. I am f-ing hurt. However for the sake of your own happiness, I have to make peace with your decision. I promise I’ll hush. I confidently know I am far better than her, but I have to succumb to the fact that she has defeats me. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . This babe cost him around rm1k. Now I officially become his other gf (fact!). Hmpphh. *cerita ini telah direka dengan sengajanya oleh si pencinta kucing..lols*

yesterday..and they meet again..

Yesterday- Leona Lewis They can take tomorrow and the plans we made, They can take the music that will never play, All the broken dreams, take everything, Just take it away, but they can never have yesterday, They can take the future that will never know They can take the places that we said we will go, All the broken dreams take everything, Just take it away, but they can never have yesterday Of what happened few hours ago:

*They used to be lovers, somehow the guy betray the relationship, left the girl with pure hatred and vengeance.

After 4 years, particularly 4 days from now, they are going to meet again. Yours truly is going to be the middle person,and the sole responsibility is to avoid the possible awkward situation between them.. hehe. There wont be a glimmer of chance to live the past relationship lah, both have move on. Thus i guess my role is very simple. lols.

And this song..is actually meant for something. Well why so serious? Just enjoy then ;)

Quote of the day

Mell as of today in Sushi King 1B yg nda sedap

Time spent with cats is never wasted. ~Sidonie-Gabrielle Colette~

So what are you waiting for? Happy weekend!

Dont bother to read this.

Tag from Ann, my lil sis childhood friend. [01] Do you ever wonder what your ex is up to? - No i don't. [02] Have you ever been given roses? - Yes i have. [03] What is your all-time favorite romance movie? - to hell with is. I lurrrvvve 10things i hate about you and He was cool (it's a korean movie) [04] Had a Long Distance Relationship? - Currently on it. [05] Do you believe in this saying-What goes around comes around? - I definitely do. [06] Do you want to get married? - Who doesn't? [07] How many kids do you want to have? - Adui..I accept how many God wants to give me lah. [08] Whats your favorite color(s)? - Blue, white, pink [09] Who was the last person you held hands with? - I dont recall. LOLs. For sure it's not a guy's hand la. [10] Do you believe in love at first sight? - I do ;) [11] Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? - Over and over again babe! [12] At what age did you start noticing the opposite gender? - At the age when i know who to call dad/mom? lols. [13] Do you like anyone? - I do like many-one. [14] Do you know someone who likes you? - I do. ;) [15] Do you love anyone? - Buduh oo..fikir sendiri lah. [16] Do they know you like/love them? - same as 15. [17] Why did you and your most recent ex break up? - He two-timed me, and i'm glad he did that. [18] When did you two last speak to one another? - I dont recall,must be looooooonnnggg time ago. [19] Would you get back together with your ex? - I wouldn't!!! [20] What comes to your mind when you think of love? - happy happy feeling :) [21] Is there anyone who knows you inside and out? - Yes, but only few. [22] Tag anyone? - Nope. Let them have a peaceful life.

Today's post

I like guy who smells good. Be it the smell from his cologne, hair gel etc, as long as it brings pleasant odour to my nose, i'm liking it. Like other human beings, somehow, we can tell when its too much of wangi wangian. *Based on true story. lols.* Dad bought a perfumes set for himself,but he only likes it for 3days. He gave it to my youngest bro then,which i think was a very bad decision. (Dad is in 50's,mind you) I hate the smell! As soon as he sprays it onto his body, the smell strikes me straight to the nasal, and gives me nothing but the hate feeling. It cause me headache too. siit. I said to bro "The smell is way too masculine for you, u're only 17. Go use my lotion saja la." He replied ' I dont want, it smells like a girl which i am not' -_-" The scent itself is killing, let me tell you how many layers of wangi wangian he puts. Two. The talc then the EDT spray. I said,"if you can smell your own scent, means u have put too much of it. It kills,ok?" He said 'hm..' Now he only uses the talc. Good boy. I wonder what makes him so keen of using this kind of scent. The only logical reason i can think of is...he's in the process of getting a gf. Anyway, it has been few months of nose abusing, miraculously i'm immune by the killing scent already. The moral behind the story: -Invest some $$ to scent yourself . As long as you smells good will do lah. Each of us can bring effect to those surround us, you kneooww. -To guys: Dont give your perfume to ur son,it's always NOT a good idea. *2 days without streamyx connection is a total suck! That explains my absence during day time, hopefully tomorrow it'll ok.*

What If..

Another great lyric from a great composer

~What if we were wrong about each other? What if you were really meant for me? What if we were supposed to be together? Would that not mean anything?~ -What if by Babyface (not Wel yang babyface ) -

I've encountered with lots of 'what if' questions in life, and it remains. I know i'm not the only one. God please, make time goes slower

To Youuuuu..

To Christina Aguilera, i pinjam lagu you. deleted. :p

Save me from myself - sang by the author of this blog It's not so easy loving me It gets so complicated All the things you gotta be Everything's changing But you're the truth I'm amazed by all your patience Everything I put you through when I'm about to fall Somehow you're always waiting with Your open arms to catch me You're gonna save me from myself From myself You're gonna save me from myself

..the hell with the quality, i just want to sing. ( in fact i'm only using my SE phone, and equip with perasaan yang melebih lebih)..and oh,my sis imeem's acc. LOLs. The song is dedicated especially to Fred, the BF. Happy 2x birthday! And Fred, you have no choice but to love me PS: You probably not going to see this song by tomorrow. Listen while you can. Hah! If you're not Simon Cowell, just shut up and go play with ur cats. LOLs.

Commenters: Your comments haz been approved by meh...

Untitle song..LOLs

~~ When someone captured your heart then that's just it, no explanation, no nothing. You just embraced every moment, and cherish each seconds of it. This song i listen just now says.. "..oh baby, dont you break this spell i'm under." And i'm not hoping that to happen just yet. Just let it flow, and us follow ~~ PS. Who wants to upah penulis lirik yang suka kucing dan icecream? jk. Please leave decent comments ok, dont spoil the mood. I benci taw.

Memories..

I really hate forwarded emails, to me the senders are all retards. However,i make an exception for this one particular email. It brings back the old school memories, and i'm just proud to be able to recall all of these. Saya belum tua ukey?

Only for the 80's babeh, is the title. The foods..

This biscuits..hm..ok ok la..too sweet to my liking.

You only can get 3 small bubble gums per box, it tastes good anyway.

Tora datang lagi!!..well,this has to be the cream of the crop. I only love the chocs, the toys i give to adiks. Adjacent to tora is ding dang, which i dont fond of.

The games

I hate these soldiers' miniature. Everytime when the bros are playing, they'll end up in fight. The reason 'dia curi askar saya, so saya tidak cukup askar!'..hmm..kids -_-"

You need these to play the tapak tapak game. I dont really know how to play the game, all that i know you must have the skills to win. LOLs.

This only can be play under dad's supervision. Tidak best.

I still recall the way to fold this, best bah this game. You can write the guys' name on it then la la lu lu li li, open, "this is ur bf's name". LOLs.

I heart this! It cost only 15sen per tube and one small tube can make approximately 2-3 large balloons, depending upon ur skills. When u blow and it leaks, what do you do? Hah! I knowwww... kekeke

Aim the.......mirrors! or ur adik's smooth forehead. Yes,i am mean. hehe

Marios! The beginning stage it is. When he gets that mushroom, he becomes XL. The tulip/flower, gives him the tembak's power. Blue mushroom, extra life. I still have the game...neeehhh

Permainan ini sangat sesuai dimainkan ketika menunggu bas sekolah tiba. LOLs. Happy weekend people!

DIGEST THIS!

You're just a typical human being, i am too. Still you think you can hurt me easily. What makes u think i have the Almighty's level of patience? FCUK YOU!

Of today's rambling

..I dont like working while i'm still in holiday's mood.

...I went to my schoolmates' open house yesterday. How time flies! The guys already have the bapa bapa looks while most of the girls already gains extra kilos here and there, which i envy so much. Nonetheless, they are still as crazy as before. I'm glad the age doesnt eat away the craziness in them, or else saya saturang ja la bergila gila tau. LOL. ...Feelings are not supposed to be logical, that's what they say. Hm..Crazy beiol world. Opps. LOL. ...Aisehmen, i'm so carried away by my kebosanan-ness. I seriously need a kitten in the office. Oh, do you know how to break up cat fight? watch this AFTER taking ur meals ok. ..Hm..i want icecreams

Amaleyo yo!

..as in "I'm a Leo, yo!"

Leo-ites: July 23- August 22

About Leo the zodiac Element: Fire Positive Traits: generous, honest, warm-hearted, magnanimous, broad-minded, expansive, loving, proud, enthusiastic and creative with a flair for showmanship and drama

Negative Traits: pompous, patronising, bossy, interferring, dogmatic, intolerant, bullying, conceited, snobbish and power-mad

Likes: speculative ventures, lavish living, rich food, children, drama, pageantry and grandeur

Dislikes: doing anything safely, day-to-day living, small-minded people, penny-pinching and mean spiritedness

Compatibility: Aries, Gemini, Libra, Sagittarius

Opposite: Aquarius

credit to novareina

I know there are tonnes of horoscope readings in the net, i simply took one from novareina because it's already been simplified lah.. If you have lots of time to kill, read this one. I was laughing my as$ off as i found out the facts are mostly true. Ok, questions' time:

Soalan pertama: Apakah kaitan horoscope dengan diri anda? Tiada kaitan langsung, kami bukan bersaudara pun. Haha. *off sot-ness mode* Sebenarnya, saya tidak pernah mempercayai bacaan horoskop, jadi saya tidak melihat sebarang kaitan antara horoskop dan diri saya ukey? Soalan kedua: Apakah perasaan anda kalau tiba-tiba horoscope itu katakan yang anda tidak baik pada tahun hadapan dan apakah tindakan yang mungkin anda lakukan? Saya tidak perlu berbuat apa apa. Saya sangat mempercayai diri saya, dan saya tahu apa yang saya lakukan. Noktah. Soalan Ketiga: Adakah anda bergantung kepada ramalan? Tidak, kerana saya cuma percaya akan kebolehan diri.

Soalan Keempat:

Ok,i'm about to break the rules. Am not tagging anyone. hehe. Anyway,

Syarat-Syarat tag:

1. Umur tidak boleh dipaparkan (tapi kalau sudah terpapar, tiada masalah yang akan timbul).
2. Tag dalam bahasa English dan Bahasa Malaysia diterima. Kalau ada tag dalam bahasa Tamil juga diterima tapi saya baca dalam hati saja, tidak kasi tau orang apa ertinya.
3. Jawab semua soalan 1,2,3, dan 4 .

Haha. ctrl-c habis cakapan si San. LOLs.